Sherrie's Always Write

A Mind Less Traveled





Speed, agility, and intellect are the key focus of every teachers’ foray back into the classroom for the annual back to school opening ceremonies. We marvel at the Olympians who travel from around the world to compete in the quadrennial games hosted by an exotic country, but we know little about the games played out each year in the school classroom. Explore the tougher pursuits that classroom leaders of our little leprechauns must battle every day. These are true Gold Medal winners!

image2 (12)Bladder Control Throughout the school day, your tiny loved ones must be allowed to tinkle on demand and with liberal regularity. But for teachers, this is an unknown luxury. It’s a catch 22 for every teacher who’s ever had to mentally prepare for the day. It starts with multiple forms of caffeine piloted down the throat so that morning energy is at peak capacity when the little darlings arrive. Then before the children’s first break comes, the dreaded pee-pee dance for teacher has become an art form all on its own. The Bladder Control competition is fierce, and there are many losers. For your child’s holiday teacher gift, consider giving him or her a thoughtful certificate to a Urologist, or even a sweetly wrapped bag of Depends.

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Backpack Bingo We’ve all purchased the latest Disney or Marvel Comics backpack for our sweet little urchins. But at the end of the day, teachers must tap the telekinetic region of their brain to help decipher which Captain America backpack belongs to Johnny, and which one gets a ride home with Patrick. There’s nothing worse than a teacher receiving a middle of the night phone call from an angry parent questioning the detention slip inadvertently slipped into the wrong child’s book bag. Teachers not only have to be aware of and keep track of every child’s belongings, they must develop a 6th sense that serves as a tracking device. This competition is more competitive in First and Second grade classrooms.

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Runny Nose Race You’ve sent the required 2 boxes of Kleenex to school listed on your child’s supply list. But did you ever stop to think about how your 6-year old keeps his nose clean during cold season? Teachers must not only instruct a roomful of little Petrie dishes who don’t feel well enough to learn today, but must also assist in the wiping of nose after nose. Visions of children lined up at the teacher’s desk to secure one of the precious facial tissues and eventually are assisted in wiping the snotty mess off their face hits me square in the gag button. However, you should commend your child’s teacher for not only wiping noses all day long, but for building their own resistance to bacteria-viral strains carried only by munchkins under the age of 7. Gold medals given all around!

image5 (6)Craft Hour Hurdles Susie once again brought home a refrigerator-worthy artful masterpiece of macaroni glued to a blue hand silhouette mounted on a less than sturdy paper plate. You marvel at your child’s crafting prowess, but never give a second thought at the man-hours invested by the teacher so that every child ends up with a Monet they can call their own. Once the art supplies have been personally purchased by the teacher (don’t get me started on this one), arranged said supplies on every desk while the children are at recess, rounded up 30 oversized painting smocks (really these are Goodwill men’s shirts), and said a prayer, the overcharged and high strung kiddos come racing back in from the playground to tap their inner artist. The teacher assists each child dip their hand into quick-drying, blue, tempera paint, imprint it onto a paper plate, keep Hayley from eating the Elmer’s glue, clean up hard elbow macaroni from the floor 27 times, write each child’s name on their artwork, clean 30 sets of blue hands, and store the newly created Renoirs in a safe place to dry. This is completed in under one hour, because these little buggers have short attention spans. There’s no medal worthy enough for this competition. But if there was, it would be made from some heavenly substance and have superhuman powers to teleport your child’s teacher to a bathtub filled with Calgon bubbles. Photo by

This Schoolyear / Olympic season, don’t forget the unsung heroes in classroom trenches around the world. Each teacher is not only an Olympian athlete but is a champion of children in a gladiator ring full of lions.


Sherrie’s Always Write

Tune in tomorrow for Thirsty Thursday Whiskey Run Amonk

Read yesterday’s Trending Tuesday 10 Rio Olympic Refugee Athletes Without a Country

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I proudly waive the flag of my beloved country. 10 Rio Refugee Athletes enter this year’s Olympic games dreaming of Gold, Silver, and Bronze, but have no country with whom to celebrate the potential fruits of their labor. Every Olympic games, there are athletes who compete without a country for various reasons. This year, 43 refugees were whittled down to 10 athletes, and for the First Time have joined forces to compete as a unified team. They are the orphans of the Olympiad games, but they belong to us all. The team will compete under the Olympic flag, and if any one of these spectacular athletes wins a medal, Continue reading “TRENDING TUESDAY 10 RIO OLYMPIC REFUGEE ATHLETES WITHOUT A COUNTRY”



The Olympics begin this Friday, August 5th, 2016, but don’t expect live Opening Ceremony coverage. Nor should you expect Rio’s president to attend. Israeli Sports Minister will miss the ceremony to honor her country’s Sabbath, even though she does not practice Shabbat personally. The USA will march in the ceremonies toward the front in alphabetical order under “E,” and a retired Victoria Secret model will take center stage at the games.  Join Sherrie’s Always Write as we explore the WHY behind each story.




This month our neighbors to the South are hosting the 31st Olympiad. But being from the Midwest, I wanted to shed light on games that are no longer part of the formal International Olympic Committee’s (IOC) approved competition schedule. However, each unusual game was at one point part of the official summer or winter games over the last century. But don’t worry your pretty little Yankee head. These odd games thrive and are alive in states like Texas, Oklahoma, Kansas, Missouri, Arkansas, and Nebraska. Rumors have been strategically leaked that the lesser known RNBKACH (Red Neck Bald Knobber Arkie Corn Husker) Committee is formulating a You Tube application process as of this writing.  Please note, that attempts to imitate these lesser-known games are done at your own risk. They should be recorded and immediately published for others’ enjoyment on the World Wide What-the…?!


Sherrie’s Always Write Blog Checklist for Next Week

Next week, Sherrie’s Always Write brings weekday humor and worldly insight to your inbox Monday – Friday. Each provides a 4 to 5 minute commentary on topics ranging from the hilarious made up Olympics in the Midwest to Lunchbox Drinks for the Curtain Climbers. Don’t miss our Freelance Friday Guest Blogger Benjamin Thomas as he imparts wisdom on How to Attract Readers Using Top Blogging Basics.

Continue reading “Sherrie’s Always Write Blog Checklist for Next Week”



Zika Mania is not to be confused with the boys from Liverpool – Beatle Mania. Not since the dreaded bedbug found in 4-hour nap establishments and certain college dorm rooms has there been so much hype about an insect. Mosquitos creep me out on a psychological level and are carriers of the “Gross” factor above and beyond what can be described in this blog. Brushing that aside, Continue reading “TRENDING TUESDAY ZIKA MANIA”

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